Another Van Disaster

Newsletter 2019-09-29

My van died. Again. This story isn’t a repost. Minivans are the most majestic of all vehicles on the road, yet mine is letting me down with increasing regularity. It has 134,000 miles on it, which might be part of the problem. Also, I’m starting to suspect it secretly hates me. Actually, not-so-secretly. Leaving me stranded for the second time in a month isn’t exactly a subtle way to try to kill me. I’m sure the van would work just fine for somebody else. Maybe I should let my kids drive.

This time, I was leaving work when it happened. I turned the key in the ignition, and the entire van shook. I waited a moment to see if the problem was something external, like an extremely localized earthquake, but the van kept right on vibrating while the rest of the world stood still. What a let down. Then indicators started lighting up on the dashboard. They seemed unrelated, but I know literally nothing about cars. My basic approach to fix any problem with one is to hand the mechanic my credit ca…