Are We There Yet?

Newsletter 2018-07-02

The Never-Ending Journey

I'm writing this update on the road, not because I'm pressed for time, but because I'm not sure if this trip will ever end. The GPS says we're an hour from our house, but it's lied to me before. Our supposedly eight and a half hour trip has already taken well over 10. I think my GPS is selective with the truth because it knows if it was honest about the total time up front, I would never leave home. It's probably getting kickbacks from the oil companies, fast food franchises, and the pharmaceutical industry. After spending this many hours in a car with my kids, I'm certain I need a pill for something.

This is the first email I've written collaboratively with my wife, but not by choice. I'm writing this with voice-to-text in the passenger seat while she drives, so she hears everything I say. Occasionally, she chimes in, and my phone picks it up. Assume all the good lines came from her. Also, assume I'm not saying that under duress. Please don't crash and kill us,…