The Strangest Anniversary We've Ever Had

Newsletter 2018-08-27

As of Saturday, my wife and I have been married for eleven years. If it were a prison sentence, getting that much time would take a pretty serious crime. Maybe not murder, but at least embezzlement or chewing with your mouth open. But the only crime Lola and I committed was saying “I do.” And maybe also some embezzlement. Married couples can’t be forced to testify against each other, so you’ll never know.

To celebrate our eleventh anniversary, we did something we've never done before: We ran a race together. This wasn’t some romantic gesture on my part. You know me better than that. It was actually a run I do every year, but this time it just happened to fall on our anniversary. I obviously wasn’t going to skip it—there was free booze involved—so I went to plan B: I invited Lola to come along. To my surprise, she accepted, and my plan to neglect my wife while I got drunk by myself suddenly transformed into a romantic day of getting drunk together. I might finally have this whole marria…