Stolen

Newsletter 2019-03-11

This weekend, I, like most of you, was robbed of one of the most precious hours of my life. Daylight saving time snuck into my house like a thief in the night and took sixty minutes of my beauty rest. Well, my average-looking rest. There aren’t enough hours in the night for me to ever be beautiful. I’d have to hibernate.

I’ll never understand why daylight saving time is scheduled for the middle of the weekend. Why can’t we lose the last hour of the workday on a Friday so we could all go home sixty minutes early? If daylight saving time threatened worker productivity, it would be abolished overnight. If you want change, don’t appeal to Congress. Just inconvenience Amazon or Google.

Why do we change time twice a year? Because we’ve been changing time for a very long time, end of list. If we had never had daylight saving time before and someone proposed it for the first time today, we would utterly destroy them. You might have thought I was going to say “politely disagree with them,” but t…