The Third Pig

Newsletter 2024-06-07

This story is still developing. I’m waiting for a phone call that could determine the course of the next two weeks or twenty years. As with all important situations in my life, this one involves a pig. More specifically, a third one, which might be coming to our house very soon. It’s not a fake-out this time, like when we got our guinea pigs, who, for the record, are a delight. I can’t recommend those furry potatoes highly enough. Today’s tale is about a full-size mini pig, which is six times smaller than a farm pig but a million times bigger than what the internet thinks they should be. Even today, after eight years of successful pig ownership, online commenters still snicker at me like I got duped when they see that my pigs are exactly as big as we expected them to be. We knew what we were getting into then, much like we know the risks right now. “Temporary” doesn’t always mean temporary. My kids are rooting so hard for us to become a swine foster family. My wife, meanwhile, is praying that the crisis blows over without involving us. We won’t know more until the phone rings. A pig’s future hangs in the balance.

It all started with a fire.